Saturday, November 15, 2008

Mindfuck Manifesto: Urine - A Revolution

Duchamp does not play, Dada

If you pick up a newspaper these days, chances are pretty high that you’ll come across a story mourning the state of the world. But know what ? no worries - the world has always had its doomsday criers. The human spirit is nothing if not resilient. In fact, some of mankind’s brightest ideas have arguably come from its darkest times. So, as the world undergoes a seemingly startling amount of political, social & economic turmoil, you have to ask yourself, what kind of exciting cultural movements have been gaining steam? What fiesty feats of creativity will mankind achieve in these dark days?

Ladies and gents, if I may have a few seconds of your time, I'd like to give you the Urine Revolution. What? Thats the most stupid thing you've heard in your life, you say? There’s no such thing as a social movement for the upheaval of urine visibility, you yell?

Well naysayer feast your eyes on merely a few, urine-related stories that have recently leaked into the press

1)
Urine therapy - Well, this isn't so much a recent newstory as much as it is a public service reminder regarding the subversive artform of Urine therapy. To quote wikipedia, urine therapy pertains to "applications of human urine for medicinal or cosmetic purposes, including drinking of one's own urine and massaging one's skin with one's own urine." I don't have much to add, but feel free to read more about this rarely publicized practice @ your own leisure.

2)
R Kelly brings Urine to the headlines– The Pied Piper pisses his pipes all over a prepubescent girl. The golden shower that was all over the news. We might have hastily judged Kellz as a pedophile and a freak-a-leak, but you might wanna start thinking of him as an innovator, a trailblazer, maybe even a martyr for his cause. Admonished for taking a stand. The Real Master P. The Martin Luther King of Urine Facial Activism. He had a (wet) dream.

3)
Civilians pissing on law enforcement – Stories of cops abusing their power is nothing new, but civilians finally exercising their inalienable right to piss in protest certainly is- With the increased level of homelessness in the world today, piss protests seem poised to be the new wave of anarchist expression.

4)
Astronauts to drink purified piss on space shuttle – Yes, you read right. NASA has developed a method to "process the crew's urine for communal consumption." All I'm sayin' is, that space shuttle's gonna have some seriously odd water cooler conversations. Mmmm minty, Is this your work, Johnson? You little dog you.

These are just a handful of headlines holmes, a cursory google search is recommended for the cautiously curious.

But remember folks, not all that glitters is gold. The path towards acheiving mainstream acceptance for Urine is an
ardous one; a sloppy, slippery slope unlike any other.

So until we all get there. Keep the faith and
hold on strong.

P.S Bonus: The Internets Celebrities take you to school on the subversive art of leaks

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